I am a follower of Jesus, but I am not a religious fundamentalist. My healing from mental illness involved a new understanding of Jesus and his message. The purpose of this website is to share what worked for me and hopefully ease the suffering of others. May you be blessed!
God is unconditional love.
Unconditional love is God.
Blessed are they who have been persecuted within themselves. It is they who have truly come to know the Father.
Jesus (Gospel of Thomas)
The Truth Will Make You Free
John 8:32
Unconditional love is God.
Blessed are they who have been persecuted within themselves. It is they who have truly come to know the Father.
Jesus (Gospel of Thomas)
The Truth Will Make You Free
John 8:32

If you are suffering from emotional or mental disorders - including addictions, anxiety, depression, hypochondria, panic attacks, bipolar disorder, borderline personality disorder, codependency, obsessive-compulsive disorder, or even schizophrenia - my story shows that real healing is possible. No one is born mentally ill. Mental illness develops in the ego in response to trauma, which often goes unrecognized.
Like I did, you may be searching desperately for relief. You may have tried to find a physical cause for ypur illness, or used your intellect to attempt to think your way to wellness. You may have found some relief by monitoring your physiology or modifying your lifestyle. Perhaps you rely on drugs to alter your brain chemistry and block out the pain. Or maybe you take solace in patriarchal religious fundamentalism that views human nature as "bad", fearful of questioning the role that such negative ideas have in your illness. These coping methods may enable you to face the world with a "survival personality", but you're not truly happy because your self-love is held captive by your false beliefs (mainly, that you are guilty) and unprocessed (and likely unacknowledged) grief.
It was only after a long struggle with panic disorder, clinical depression and acute psychosis (interspersed with periods of life-saving grace) that I finally came to understand how my fragile childhood self-love had been destroyed by physical and emotional abuse at the hands of well-meaning parents who had denied their own suffering and were ignorant of their own true nature. My understanding of my childhood situation at last enabled me to grieve the pain of the innocent and defenseless little one we all have within us - hidden pain that until then had been expressed through my various mental conditions. My profound expression of grief represented my own self-compassion and self-love, not in a narcissistic sense (which is infatuation with a false self-image), but love of who I really am, the unconditional love that is everyone's birthright. This process, clearly and undeniably guided by a divine intelligence (God), has dissolved my fear and given me the freedom to experience true peace and happiness. You can be free and happy, too.
Many in the medical/psychiatric profession claim that mental illnesses are physical "brain disorders" caused by genetically-induced chemical imbalances. This biological view is also vigorously promoted by the popular media. Though I do not deny the existence of a genetic component that may result in a "sensitive psyche" and predispose some to mental illnesses, I am convinced that these illnesses will not actually develop unless there is some triggering past trauma, generally in childhood. However, I also do not rule out the possibility that such trauma could be rooted in a past life, although I myself am not aware of having experienced any past life memories. In any case, the popular view that mental illnesses are simply physical diseases perpetuates a false separation between our spirit and our body/mind. It sells a lot of drugs and keeps the research money flowing, but at the cost of spiritual growth and true healing. Unfortunately, even when offered a choice, a high proportion of sufferers embrace the biological model of mental illness, although it holds out no hope for a cure. I believe there are two main reasons for this: a fear of self-examination, and falsely equating "cause" with "blame". But there is nothing to fear, and no one to blame. The cure lies within. Until we look there, we cannot be healed.
Here are some key points of difference between the true or essential self and the ego or conditioned self that I came to realize and understand during my healing journey:
....................................................................................
In 1999, I wrote the first draft of a book, based on my personal experience and research, which I titled Kundalini and the Morning Star. "Kundalini" is the universal force of spiritual rebirth and transformation (which many would equate with the Holy Spirit of traditional Christianity). Generally considered to be the feminine power of the Godhead, my first encounter with this force of divine love, which exists within all of us, occurred nearly 40 years ago. It instantly and permanently cured my severe panic disorder. The "Morning Star" refers to Jesus (from Revelation 22:16: “I, Jesus, have sent my angel to give you this testimony for the churches. I am the root and the offspring of David, and the bright Morning Star”).
The original book was available through my website for a few years, and feedback was highly positive. However, I was unable to earn a living through book sales and on-line counseling, and I also discovered that I was still harboring unresolved spiritual issues that hindered my ability to help others. I shut my website down and returned to my former profession as an environmental consultant. Now, more than 10 years later, having endured more suffering, but also having experienced more healing miracles (including a totally unexpected encounter with the living Jesus), I feel that I am finally ready to share my story and help other hurting souls discover who they really are. My book (new title: Kundalini and the Gift of the Morning Star: A True Story of Suffering, Miracles and Enlightenment) has been extensively revised and updated, and is available on Amazon. You don't need to own a Kindle device to download and read the e-book - the Kindle reader for your computer can be downloaded from Amazon for free simply by clicking on this link.
Kundalini and the Gift of the Morning Star elucidates the cause and effect relationship between infant/childhood trauma and mental/emotional illness, and shows how this relationship applies to various conditions including schizophrenia and clinical depression. The book stresses the underlying unity and shared values of most of the world's religious traditions and the validity of personal spiritual experience. It is meant to teach others how to unleash the healing power of their own natural compassion and self-love.
I was heartened to read the following comments from a reviewer on Amazon.ca: I loved reading about how much adversity this man was able to overcome. I can relate to him very much and he has enlightened me more than I ever believed he could through his studies and writing. I found this book on whim. A random google search months ago led me to find his website and upon quick review of the content of the website, I thought he might have hope to give me in the content of his book. And boy, did he. I am so very grateful to have come across this man's book and wisdom. I believe, as he might call it, it was a "synchronicity" that I stumbled across his writings. This book has helped me grow and learn about myself more than I had ever thought it might. It has instilled so much love and hope in my heart that will be used as a cornerstone in the foundation in my new found love for life. As someone who has personally suffered mental health issues myself, this book brought the exact hope and wisdom I needed to persevere. Mentally, I still have bad days but this book has instilled a great love and confidence in me that will never again be lost. From the bottom of my heart, thank-you Robert, for sharing with the world your hardships and how you've proved that mental health issues, no matter how severe, can be resolved with perseverance and most especially with love.
Please note: I am not against the taking of prescribed medication. In a crisis situation, I recognize that drugs can be a lifesaver. However, they do not cure, and long-term over-use can impede spiritual growth. I am also very aware that my own experiences are not "universal". We are all traveling our individual paths, and the precise nature and timing of the spiritual experiences that can both guide us, and ultimately help cure us, are unique to each of us.
___________________________________________________________
Thank you for visiting. Your comments and feedback ([email protected]) are always appreciated.
Like I did, you may be searching desperately for relief. You may have tried to find a physical cause for ypur illness, or used your intellect to attempt to think your way to wellness. You may have found some relief by monitoring your physiology or modifying your lifestyle. Perhaps you rely on drugs to alter your brain chemistry and block out the pain. Or maybe you take solace in patriarchal religious fundamentalism that views human nature as "bad", fearful of questioning the role that such negative ideas have in your illness. These coping methods may enable you to face the world with a "survival personality", but you're not truly happy because your self-love is held captive by your false beliefs (mainly, that you are guilty) and unprocessed (and likely unacknowledged) grief.
It was only after a long struggle with panic disorder, clinical depression and acute psychosis (interspersed with periods of life-saving grace) that I finally came to understand how my fragile childhood self-love had been destroyed by physical and emotional abuse at the hands of well-meaning parents who had denied their own suffering and were ignorant of their own true nature. My understanding of my childhood situation at last enabled me to grieve the pain of the innocent and defenseless little one we all have within us - hidden pain that until then had been expressed through my various mental conditions. My profound expression of grief represented my own self-compassion and self-love, not in a narcissistic sense (which is infatuation with a false self-image), but love of who I really am, the unconditional love that is everyone's birthright. This process, clearly and undeniably guided by a divine intelligence (God), has dissolved my fear and given me the freedom to experience true peace and happiness. You can be free and happy, too.
Many in the medical/psychiatric profession claim that mental illnesses are physical "brain disorders" caused by genetically-induced chemical imbalances. This biological view is also vigorously promoted by the popular media. Though I do not deny the existence of a genetic component that may result in a "sensitive psyche" and predispose some to mental illnesses, I am convinced that these illnesses will not actually develop unless there is some triggering past trauma, generally in childhood. However, I also do not rule out the possibility that such trauma could be rooted in a past life, although I myself am not aware of having experienced any past life memories. In any case, the popular view that mental illnesses are simply physical diseases perpetuates a false separation between our spirit and our body/mind. It sells a lot of drugs and keeps the research money flowing, but at the cost of spiritual growth and true healing. Unfortunately, even when offered a choice, a high proportion of sufferers embrace the biological model of mental illness, although it holds out no hope for a cure. I believe there are two main reasons for this: a fear of self-examination, and falsely equating "cause" with "blame". But there is nothing to fear, and no one to blame. The cure lies within. Until we look there, we cannot be healed.
Here are some key points of difference between the true or essential self and the ego or conditioned self that I came to realize and understand during my healing journey:
- The false self (ego) does not know the truth that there is no death.
- The true self knows that it is eternal.
- The false self believes in guilt, which it itself has created.
- The true self sees innocence everywhere.
- The false self does not understand love.
- The true self is unconditional Love, which is God.
- The false self believes in victimhood.
- The true self knows that we all create our current situations, for reasons that will eventually be known to us.
....................................................................................
In 1999, I wrote the first draft of a book, based on my personal experience and research, which I titled Kundalini and the Morning Star. "Kundalini" is the universal force of spiritual rebirth and transformation (which many would equate with the Holy Spirit of traditional Christianity). Generally considered to be the feminine power of the Godhead, my first encounter with this force of divine love, which exists within all of us, occurred nearly 40 years ago. It instantly and permanently cured my severe panic disorder. The "Morning Star" refers to Jesus (from Revelation 22:16: “I, Jesus, have sent my angel to give you this testimony for the churches. I am the root and the offspring of David, and the bright Morning Star”).
The original book was available through my website for a few years, and feedback was highly positive. However, I was unable to earn a living through book sales and on-line counseling, and I also discovered that I was still harboring unresolved spiritual issues that hindered my ability to help others. I shut my website down and returned to my former profession as an environmental consultant. Now, more than 10 years later, having endured more suffering, but also having experienced more healing miracles (including a totally unexpected encounter with the living Jesus), I feel that I am finally ready to share my story and help other hurting souls discover who they really are. My book (new title: Kundalini and the Gift of the Morning Star: A True Story of Suffering, Miracles and Enlightenment) has been extensively revised and updated, and is available on Amazon. You don't need to own a Kindle device to download and read the e-book - the Kindle reader for your computer can be downloaded from Amazon for free simply by clicking on this link.
Kundalini and the Gift of the Morning Star elucidates the cause and effect relationship between infant/childhood trauma and mental/emotional illness, and shows how this relationship applies to various conditions including schizophrenia and clinical depression. The book stresses the underlying unity and shared values of most of the world's religious traditions and the validity of personal spiritual experience. It is meant to teach others how to unleash the healing power of their own natural compassion and self-love.
I was heartened to read the following comments from a reviewer on Amazon.ca: I loved reading about how much adversity this man was able to overcome. I can relate to him very much and he has enlightened me more than I ever believed he could through his studies and writing. I found this book on whim. A random google search months ago led me to find his website and upon quick review of the content of the website, I thought he might have hope to give me in the content of his book. And boy, did he. I am so very grateful to have come across this man's book and wisdom. I believe, as he might call it, it was a "synchronicity" that I stumbled across his writings. This book has helped me grow and learn about myself more than I had ever thought it might. It has instilled so much love and hope in my heart that will be used as a cornerstone in the foundation in my new found love for life. As someone who has personally suffered mental health issues myself, this book brought the exact hope and wisdom I needed to persevere. Mentally, I still have bad days but this book has instilled a great love and confidence in me that will never again be lost. From the bottom of my heart, thank-you Robert, for sharing with the world your hardships and how you've proved that mental health issues, no matter how severe, can be resolved with perseverance and most especially with love.
Please note: I am not against the taking of prescribed medication. In a crisis situation, I recognize that drugs can be a lifesaver. However, they do not cure, and long-term over-use can impede spiritual growth. I am also very aware that my own experiences are not "universal". We are all traveling our individual paths, and the precise nature and timing of the spiritual experiences that can both guide us, and ultimately help cure us, are unique to each of us.
___________________________________________________________
Thank you for visiting. Your comments and feedback ([email protected]) are always appreciated.